No, no I am not going to be writing about alcohol and children.
I wanted to take a moment and address the question that I get on a n almost daily basis which is “Michelle, my son/daughter sees spirits what should I do? How do I handle this?”
To be honest, I have no idea. (Insert sarcastic font). I know I am a great help and very comforting; it’s a gift and a curse. (End sarcastic font). But when it comes to parenting if you have read the other entries in this blog you know I am flying by the seat of my pants.
Don’t get me wrong; I am a good parent and I do my best, but I make mistakes like everyone else that is the name of this parenting game. The other gotcha is that what works for my kids and my family might not work for your kids and your family. On top of that what works for one child may not work for another child. There is more than one answer and more than one right way to help a child.
Which leads me back to why I have no idea what to say when you ask me how to respond to your child when they are experiencing spirit. There is more than one right answer and you know your own child and family dynamic better than I do. There is not one answer that fits the bill.
What I will try to do is share with you things that have helped me along the way and maybe they will help guide you to finding the answer you seek.
1. It is my belief that 90% of imaginary friends are not imaginary. This is just a good rule of thumb. When I was two a man would be in my room or around me often. Like any good parent; my parents would often check things out and tell me nothing was there. But I saw someone; someone who was as real to me as they were. Sometimes it is helpful to get more information before you discount what might be possible.
2. Listen – if your child feels like you are a good sounding board then they will tell you everything. This is a good thing. I know having someone to talk to saved me. It is freeing to have someone to confide in and you definitely feel less alone.
3. Try not to knock it – you may not want to draw too much attention to it; but don’t tell them it isn’t possible. They truly are experiencing something real if they are telling you about it. They are also scared and trying to navigate through what they are experiencing. If you discount it then they feel as if there is something wrong with them.
4. Let them know they have the power – Make sure your child knows they have the power to ask any spirit to leave them alone. Children often think they have to listen or are at the will of someone who is older than them. Make sure that they know they have the power to pray for help or even ask a spirit to leave them alone. They are the king/queen of their domain here on Earth and they can ask any spirit to leave them alone for any reason.
5. Take away the fear – sometimes just letting a child know that most of the spirits that visit them are loved ones or guardians can help make them less afraid of the unknown. If you have pictures of ancestors get them out and let your kids take a look. You might be surprised at who they are able to recognize and tell you about.And this helps them to recognize who they might be seeing helping them to be less afraid.
6. Love them – you know your child, your belief system of your family best. Follow your intuition and it will guide you to the right things to say and do for your child.
These tips helped me and they are things I use with my own children. Hopefully this gives those of you that have asked me this question additional guidance.
Until next time,