January Lessons

January – the new year – the year of the horse. I was born in the year of the horse, so this should be my year, right?!

I hope the year of the horse is going well for you.

At the close of each month I try to reflect on what I have learned about being authentically me and also things I have learned in general. I then share that with you in the hopes that my lessons will help you somehow. Maybe help you feel less alone or maybe not make the same mistakes I did in my path to imperfection.

This month these are the following things I thought I would share:

1. When I see how much other people are suffering I actually lose my “voice” so to speak. It has been really hard to write this week. Three different nights I have sat down at the computer hoping to type something uplifting, witty, or at least readable and it was to no avail. I am sure those of you that frequent my blog or that live nearby have heard of the Kranz family and JLK. Those of you who don’t know; JLK is a 6-year-old little girl who on her birthday was diagnosed with DIPG; an incurable form of cancer and this week hospice was called in to the Kranz home and it literally took my voice away, because every silly complaint I had was thoroughly overshadowed by this family that is dealing with the unimaginable. I also have a dear friend whose sister is going through Chemo. And while the outlook for her is good; the idea that someone so young, kind, and generous having to fight everyday to be healthy for her young son is just…well..just unfair.

And then today; after reading the most recent JLK blog post; which was filled with thanks, strength, and hope – it just hit me that life is going to be unfair, bad things happen to good people, and life is truly about dancing in the rain – whatever comes your way, you have to make the most of whatever that is; however you can.

2. 36 Random Acts of kindness to perform in one weekend was not possible for me. I set out to do a Random Act of Kindness for every year that I was born on my birthday this month and I gave myself a weekend to accomplish it – I am still not done. It is just way to much to do in one weekend. I did however do the following…

• Deliver cookies to the fire station
• Deliver flowers to my friend Rebecca and let her know how thankful I am for her
• Deliver flowers to my friend Janet and thank her for being there to chat
• Deliver flowers to Debbie my son’s friend’s mom and thank her for raising such a wonderful son. I am so grateful that he has such a great playmate and friend.
• Deliver snacks to the yard duty/car drop off/pick up at my son’s school. She is always so happy and helpful.
• Hold the door open for every person that I see
• Smile at strangers
• Help my daughter clean her room
• Take dinner to neighbors that just had a baby
• Ding dong ditch someone with a gift
• Leave change on a vending machine
• Write in a compliment about great service
• Bring cookies to ER staff
• Donate books, coloring books and crayons to ER waiting room
• Let someone go in front of me in line
• Do an egg hunt at the park – this was awesome by the way.
• Bought bracelets from some kids to help them earn $ at their yard sale – I used these and some I made in the egg hunt. The kids that found them LOVED them.
• Write notes of inspiration – I mailed and delivered in person 3 of these messages
• Let a friend borrow a book you know they have been wanting to read
• Walk through the neighborhood and pick up garbage – the kids helped me with this one.
• Leave dollar bills in the kids section of the dollar store – this one was kind of awkward because it is pretty busy on a Saturday and some of the patrons gave me some weird looks.
• I stopped to help a patron pick up a display they knocked over (this has happened three more times since. I seriously now think I have some random knock over energy I carry around with me because every where I go now someone is knocking something over and I am helping them clean it up).
• Buy coffee for a stranger.
• Donate clothes
• Donate to Alzheimer’s Association
• adopt a soldier
• I did a nice thing for myself and threw a last-minute birthday party – I was showered with love and having my friends and family near made my day! I am really glad I did that.

So that is what I have done so far. I have more to do, but it was a start.

3. Homeless people refuse donations. Seriously, I did not know this. For one of my 36 RAK’s I made up a bag of Clif bars; water, toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, deodorant, etc. for someone who was homeless. When I stopped to give it to them; they said no thanks I have enough of that stuff. I did not expect that at all. Interesting things that you learn from other people.

4. Moms are awesome. I was having a bummer day and my mom out of nowhere texts me and says how great I am and shows me a picture of the “We can do hard things” sign I made her. She put it up in her classroom. And she brought sundaes to me and the kids out of the blue one day. She is AMAZING. I love my mom. I knew mom’s were amazing before now, but just wanted to note how even though I am an adult, my mom’s mommy sense was right on the money about knowing how much I needed someone to let me know I was loved.

5. Someone really can say mom too many times. I love my kids. You all know how much I love my kids; but I have two-three year olds and one seven-year old who start every single sentence with “MOM”. After 3 months of this I am losing it a bit. Awful, because I do know one day I am going to really dislike the quiet and wish someone was saying mom, but I did actually tell my husband today that if one more kid said mom I was going to lose my shit. The look on his face was priceless. Absolutely priceless. Needless to say I have been upstairs blogging for the last two hours in peace and quiet. Thank you wonderful husband and sweet children for letting mom have some “me” time.

6. Undoing “perfectionism” is really hard work. I am trying really hard to not force myself to live up to my unrealistic expectations, but it is challenging. I guess it took 30 years to get this way; if it takes 5 or 6 or more to undo it then that is okay.

7. AWE. I am in awe that so many of you stop by and visit little old me on this blog. Thank you all for stopping by and reading my blog. You have no idea how much it means to have your support. My husband told me the other day I have 99 followers. I can’t even believe it. That is pretty amazing that almost 100 people stop by here and read what I have to say. Thank you from the very bottom of my heart.

By the way, I would love if you left a comment here about what you would like to see me write about in the future.

Hugs and sincerest thanks,

M